these days of June

My days are bittersweet.  Sweet  because of the garden.  Sweet because I have time to just be. But bitter because my job as an art teacher are over, (at least for this time), and there was so much more I wanted to do... and I loved this job so much. 

Next year our school district will have no middle school electives at all.  No art, no choir, shop or band.  High school thankfully will still have art and band.  So my sons day will still be rich in music.

Still, I have a job as an elementary school teacher somewhere in my district.  And I will find ways to incorporate art into every day... dance and three dimensional work as well...I can have that science/nature table again, and younger and sweeter students who are not going through such difficult hormonal times.

Some mornings I wake up in a panic... where will I be in September?  But other mornings I am fine... almost.  For now I just wait and love my garden, later in the summer I will begin the job of moving out of my art room.  I remind myself that many people have much worse problems...

This is a collage of two images, one myself, that I cut out and glued on the other, a close up of a peony with matt medium.  I added a layer of the medium over them both.  My husband says... "oh another woman reaching..."  but oh well.  It is what we do.  Here is the peony photo:

Summer days are my own.  My son is working for the Forest Service again this summer.  This time as a leader of his own crew for the Youth Conservation Crew. He and my husband drive down to California together everywhere.  Their district is called the "Goose Nest,"  so appropriate for this area.  I miss them and run out to greet them when they drive up every day...

I used the same method in this picture I took of my daughter when she was just a teen, and sat her on the columbine. To me it is as though she and the flower are having a conversation...

More colors of my world...

And two new collages as I find my new direction...

as the days unravel... and know at least for right now, 

this is where I am, "Meant to Be."

Comments

[jeane]

wow! a huge change and I'm sure a bit scary to be pulled out of a situation that you loved - you are needed in another place that you don't even know about yet! :)

[lynne]

such a beautiful post, roxanne. yes, i agree with jeane -- you are needed in another place... *and* my heart is with you at this time of change. i love what you're doing with the photographs, combining images. it's wonderful! as for 'reaching women', i agree; it's what we do...

sending you love, and see you soon... xo

[Robyn]

Change is never easy and the fact that art can just be done away with is a hard pill to swallow. Just know that you are going to bring joy to your new pupils. You can't help but share your love of colour and art. The clothes you wear, the posters you create, splashes of colour on hand crafted book covers....it's all part of being Roxanne.

[lyle baxter]

rejoice! the economy cant take the creativity out of your life! you will find more and better ways to share your gift! lyle

[katiejane]

Oh Roxanne, so sorry about your art teacher job. That is such a pity. Not just for you, but for the students that will not be touched by you as well. So sad. Maybe in another year or two..
I love your peony and columbine collages. Especially the one of your daughter. She looks like a garden fairy.
Enjoy your summer days. I'm sure you will fit into your new role this fall just fine.

[Jennifer Mazzucco]

wow, roxanne, i had no idea! that must be why you asked me if my school was affected by the economy... i can't believe we both have spent our days with those hormonal medium sized humans... yes, little ones are so much more full of enthusiasm for learning, positive energy, open-mindedness... you will be surrounded by love! i can see an art/science/nature table growing... and art being woven into all of your daily plans... how about the kids start art journals in the beginning of the year and they can be used during any free time? i just moved my art room, so i know how hard that can be. just remember to take it slow, breathe and know that the universe and (all the other things in it) will take care of you. and remember to decorate your new classroom with YOUR artwork - make it a sanctuary for you to be in... peace, jennifer

[Leslie M.]

Wow, I was heartbroken for you reading this post about the programs being terminated from the middle school curriculum. But the comments that come before mine made me feel so much better. You will be reaching new students, inspiring them. Perhaps there is a larger plan at work here.

I love the images of your garden, collages, and the colors of your world.

[mary ann]

Roxanne, The "not-knowing" is the difficult part to this summer for you but as you said the sweetness is in the beauty and time. Your work and your garden are as your angels.

[Toni Brown]

strange to me how the crucial subjects are the first to go, those that keep our minds and hearts seeking, REACHING, curious, original ... well, your plan to incorporate art as much as possible is a grand one (I'm clapping, thru tears) ...

I LOVE your 'women reaching' photos/collages. You're right, it's what we do.

[rochambeau]

Dear Roxanne,
You articulate in words, photos and art how you feel well. I feel sad too for your ending. It saddens me also for the children that thrive particularly in the arts.

I remember one of my teachers in third grade, Mr. Hamilton. He was cool. He made an ART from out of being a teacher. He read The Hobbit to us. And we had an international day. We had a fiesta, and the list goes on.

Change is hard, BUT
good thing can and do result from change many times.

Will hold you up to the light and put you upon a flower petal too.

xox
Constance

[Chris]

It IS sad. All these cuts. I bet you are SUCH a great teacher.

How cool with the photos, flowers, and medium. I've never done this. I want to try.

Love the Direction one.

[mansuetude]

you know, you have made me want to take a class with you and to go back and teach again. Where ever you are, your essence will affect anyone. Its a pleasure to know your soulfullness through here; you must be loved as a teacher.

[robruhn]

I went through a similar experience quite a few years ago, I was devastated at the time, but the change led to me becoming a graphic designer, something I would not have done without being pushed. Things happen for reasons and are usually in our favour. I love your new work too.

[azirca]

I agree with what everyone else has already said, you have some very wise friends.
May you use this time not to be sad for what you have lost but to celebrate your life and all that you have accomplished.
I wish you every happiness.
*hugs*

[Shirley Ende-Saxe]

Ah, what glorious color for summer! Beautiful photos and collage.

It's good to hear you still have a position, elementary art RULES, you know. But I understand how sad this moment must be, we live in a crazy culture that values money over everything else and the arts always get mown down by that. What is truly remarkable is how many (not rich) folks will give in blood and sweat to keep art alive. I'm sorry to hear about your school and I'm afraid for ours here. But I also know you will make the best of art teachers for the younger ones too.

[caterina giglio]

Roxanne, I am saddened that your school has cut the progam and you will be relocated. For me, change isn't hard, it is the uncertainty that creates stress.
Keep working your work is gorgeous! I always find solace in my work! richest blessings to you! caterina

[Ginny Gaskill]

I can tell that you are sad but look back at your pieces you just posted. They are beautiful! Such rich colors and wonderful emotions. I especially love the one of your daughter and the columbine.

[Susan Tuttle]

Oh Roxanne, such disheartening news -- I do understand your feelings. I used to teach elementary music and faced cuts like this. I know you will be a fabulous classroom teacher, enriching your students' lives with the arts every chance you get.

the song "long way" in your playlist is so special -- moves me very much. i've added it to mine. thank you.

xo

[Seth]

So sorry to hear about the school situation. A loss for you AND a loss for all your potential students. But things have a way of working out and I am hopeful that they will for you too! Lovely colors in this post. And some changes in style in your newest collages. Art reflecting life!!

[Katelen Tays]

What a beautiful post..I love the one of you and your daughter.
Katelen

[Jacky]

Roxanne you are going through a difficult time...I am thinking of you!
I read this quote the other day (on a particulary bad day). "No winter lasts forever, no spring skips its turn." Hal Borland. It really spoke to me so I thought I would share it with you.
I love your wonderful journal pages and your reaching lady. funny I find myself drawing reaching ladies too. I love them. I often wonder what draws me to them. I suppose they can be either reaching ladies or ladies with open arms? My last one I called "welcoming"...open arms welcoming love. Your collages are so beautiful and soulful.
Wonderful photography and I love how you have married your family photos with these botanical images (two things so very important to you).

Big hug....

Jacky xox

[Kathleen Botsford]

I am so excited for all of those young children who are on the brink of the experience of their lives! New souls to teach, to share your art, your beautiful self with. How cool is that?

[Ms.Tee]

Roxanne, I agree with the commenter above - the children that are going to be getting you for a teacher are so blessed! I would've loved to have you as a teacher in school. Your artwork is so beautiful and soothing - especially the one with your daughter on the flower. I only wish I could do that! I hope you have more relaxing and beautiful times this summer. :)

[Stephanie]

I think that rainbow portends your future, you are talented and creative and I feel your new students will be very lucky to have a teacher that will incorporate art into their every class. The other students may not be that lucky.

Horrible that these programs have to be cut!!!

[Ann Christine Dennison]

A beautiful posting, love the photos and your collages are perfect. My life is too full of change at the moment, living in uncertainty is not easy but I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Change always seems to bring something good with it :-)